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Jody Swaney
Google does not consider me certifiable but I assure you I am real.
Occupation: I am a writer, I create and manage entire worlds with words.
Location: Santee, California
His ProfilesRankThis is the rank of 'Jody Swaney' out of all Google+ Profiles.: 2,674 (GenderRankFor the gender 'Men'.: 1,496)
His ProfilesRankThis is the rank of 'Jody Swaney' out of all Google+ Profiles. in United States: 886 (GenderRankFor the gender 'Men'.: 557)
Followers: 21,567
Following: 637
Added to CircleCount.com: 07/05/2011That's the date, where Jody Swaney has been indexed by CircleCount.com.
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Jody Swaney was in following circles
Activity
Average numbers for the latest postings:
2 comments per posting'Current posts' means the last 50 posts that are at the most 4 weeks old. So this metric gives a picture of how many comments someone has received recently.
0 reshares per posting'Current posts' means the last 50 posts that are at the most 4 weeks old. So this metric gives a picture of .how often someone's posts have been reshared lately.
5 +1's per posting'Current posts' means the last 50 posts that are at the most 4 weeks old. So this metric gives a picture of how many +1's someone has received on his or her posts recently.
781 characters per posting'Current posts' means the last 50 posts that are at the most 4 weeks old. So this metric gives a picture of how many characters someone has used per post recently.
Latest postings
2013-05-20 20:24:38 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 5 +1s)
self dialog
Must not have a second Margarita before picking up my grandson fr0m school.... fighting the forces of the dark side.
2013-05-20 20:05:10 (3 comments, 0 reshares, 4 +1s)
You know how when you go and buy a lot of extra things to make your cabinets look extra full because your wife's x husband will be in town and stopping by for a meet and greet and possibly dinner and if he should happen to look into one of the cabinets you want him to be impressed...
THAT!
2013-05-20 19:38:24 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
Senor Frog...... I will try you out.
6 minutes later....
You are very nice... I think we'll be great friends.
2013-05-20 14:07:58 (2 comments, 0 reshares, 7 +1s)
This is attempted murder... nothing more nothing less.
2013-05-20 04:30:05 (2 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
So, did the Samuel just leave the knife behind when he fled the scene?
#gameofthrones
2013-05-20 04:28:33 (2 comments, 0 reshares, 2 +1s)
So... without being a spoiled sport I just have to ask, did the fat guy leave the knife behind or what?
2013-05-19 23:00:24 (4 comments, 0 reshares, 1 +1s)
So I've been thinking about the Nexus 7 HD, and you know what? I think I'm just gonna pass. I am 100 % satisfied with my picture just like it is.... Honestly I've never really been able to see a huge difference in blue ray and shit like that ..... is there anything other then a better picture that would convince me to switch from this Nexus 7?
2013-05-19 22:48:23 (9 comments, 1 reshares, 1 +1s)
This Verizon app allows me to send and receive sms and mms text from my tablet using strictly wifi.. works even if my phone is off.... Very handy.
2013-05-19 05:29:00 (3 comments, 0 reshares, 0 +1s)
Can someone message me right this second.. I want to try out the service on my N7.. Thanks
2013-05-19 05:02:50 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
People like this need horsewhipped in the town square.
I thought you might be interested in this story: Dognapped Yorkie Found Safe Near Home, http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/Yorkie-Taken-By-Dognappers-Dropped-Off-Safe-at-Home-208036481.html
Sent via the NBC SD Android App.
Download the app https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.nbcuni.nbcots.nbcsandiego.android
2013-05-19 02:53:08 (0 comments, 2 reshares, 16 +1s)
I googled writers inspiration and this photo came up... Very cool isn't it?
2013-05-18 19:45:42 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
If the dishwasher is run every night... and we haven't even eaten a meal, how can there possibly be 9 fricking glasses in the dishwasher?
Questions like these run thru my mind way more often then they should...
2013-05-18 16:45:37 (5 comments, 0 reshares, 7 +1s)
I love elephants. These were picked up last night after a great dinner with the family.
2013-05-17 21:40:11 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
middle aged wild side
(this post is complete fiction and contains adult themes and situations)
“What do you want from me!?”
The late forty something woman asked the early fifty something man, as she stood before him in the kitchen, at 6 o’clock in the morning.
“After all these years, you can’t guess what I want?” he countered looking at her with a smile.
He gazed upon her in the early morning light, in the kitchen, after almost 10 hours of love making fueled by Viagra and a few bumps of coke.
She looked amazing to him dressed in one of his undershirts and a smile, her soft womanly curves, her prominent dark nipples, and most of all the V of her center that played peek-a-boo with every move of her body. Her breasts without a bra had become fuller, and hung lower, in the years of their marriage, and her bottom that had once been as tight and firm as anyo... more »
2013-05-17 17:29:33 (1 comments, 3 reshares, 3 +1s)
middle aged wild side
(this post is complete fiction and contains adult themes and situations)
“What do you want from me!?”
The late forty something woman asked the early fifty something man, as she stood before him in the kitchen, at 6 o’clock in the morning.
“After all these years, you can’t guess what I want?” he countered looking at her with a smile.
He gazed upon her in the early morning light, in the kitchen, after almost 10 hours of love making fueled by Viagra and a few bumps of coke.
She looked amazing to him dressed in one of his undershirts and a smile, her soft womanly curves, her prominent dark nipples, and most of all the V of her center that played peek-a-boo with every move of her body. Her breasts without a bra had become fuller, and hung lower, in the years of their marriage, and her bottom that had once been as tight and firm as anyo... more »
2013-05-17 15:33:38 (9 comments, 1 reshares, 4 +1s)
who do I blow, or where do I send my check?
So, I notice some peoples posts, video, and pictures, are huge and shiney; while other peoples posts (aka mine) are not. Who decides and who do I need to suck up to, to make this happen to mine, or is it one of those things being certified as using your real name, where some get it and some don't and some just never will.
2013-05-17 14:55:58 (5 comments, 0 reshares, 6 +1s)
my pitch to land Kool-Aid as a sponsor
I suppose if I had to be completely honest I could trace my general disdain for Capri Sun, and Sunny D, and pretty much any of those sugary drinks for kids with the exception KoolAid, to the days of my youth when I drank gargantuan amounts of cheap Vodka and this shit called Tampico Fruit Punch.
It came in all of these neon colors, had a really weird smooth texture, cost less then a dollar per gallon, and pretty much destroyed your life for a few days after the drunk. Something about this punch was an actual hangover and nausea enhancer.
So for this reason, if none other, I pack KoolAid in my kids lunches.
2013-05-17 14:18:41 (0 comments, 1 reshares, 5 +1s)
Turning Points
I guess I would have to say my whole life and attitude changed when I realized the statements I don't want to have sex. and I don't want to have sex with you. Weren't the same thing.
2013-05-17 08:20:09 (5 comments, 2 reshares, 5 +1s)
I wanna be your virus
I’m not a great writer, or even a good writer, by the standards of days gone by when the greats practiced their crafts with huge teams of readers, and proof readers, and focus groups, and editors, and unlimited corporate resources, and unlimited time for re-writes and modifications, and nice fat advance checks, agents, and this and that.
But, by today’s standards, I do believe I have the ability to hold a reader’s attention for more than a few seconds.
This is no easy task when all of the entertainment in the world is just a few clicks away. I mean seriously I have to have something going for me when I can capture your attention long enough to keep you off your phone, out of your email, away from Netflix, spankwire, xxxbunker, facebook, and google+ for the few minutes that it might take you to read more than the average 10-15 word post or MeMe. I have... more »
2013-05-17 05:09:59 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 2 +1s)
Here's the thing about frank Sinatra. His music is so pure, each instrument proclaims itself without stepping on the others or distorting the music, and his Lyrics are so clear. Honestly I think he has the best enunciation of any performer I've ever listened to.
Take a second, clik the link, turn off that damned TV, and enjoy.
2013-05-17 05:00:50 (4 comments, 1 reshares, 7 +1s)
“I’ve never had an orgasm in my life.”
She said after we had several drinks in the living room, and were discussing her present and past relationships.
She said it quickly and glossed it over with several non-relevant things but her eyes told the rest of the story.
Her eyes said:
Is it weird that I’d discuss this with you? Is it weird that I need the opinion of someone who isn’t trying to bang me but is still a man? Is it weird that I want to discuss this with my step dad?
Her eyes said:
Feel free to pretend you didn't hear what I just said. Pretend you didn't hear it, and I'll pretend I didn't say it, if discussing it means things will be weird between us.
Her eyes said:
I’m bringing this to you because it weighs on me, and I don’t know where else to take it.
Her eyes said:
2013-05-17 03:58:45 (6 comments, 0 reshares, 8 +1s)
“What the hell is this?”
I asked my Son, as he prepared to read something to me that he had written on a raggedy assed legal pad that he had mined from the closet in my old office that was now his bedroom.
“It’s my daily report on news stories I have read so I can keep up with current events and won’t look like an idiot. You told me I had to do it.”
“I know what I told you. Is your computer broken?”
“No.”
“Did you break your smart phone? Is your keyboard not working?” I queried.
“No it’s all working I just wrote it on paper this time.”
“Yea…. So then it’s not finished.”
“What do you mean?” He asked.
“I mean, the world doesn’t work on legal pads anymore. What’s next are you going to send the whole fricking thing to me one sentence at a time rubber banned to the legs of pigeons? Should I wait for a calm day, h... more »
2013-05-16 21:33:15 (1 comments, 1 reshares, 1 +1s)
“I’ve never had an orgasm in my life.”
She said after we had several drinks in the living room, and were discussing her present and past relationships.
She said it quickly and glossed it over with several non-relevant things but her eyes told the rest of the story.
Her eyes said:
Is it weird that I’d discuss this with you? Is it weird that I need the opinion of someone who isn’t trying to bang me but is still a man? Is it weird that I want to discuss this with my step dad?
Her eyes said:
Feel free to pretend you didn't hear what I just said. Pretend you didn't hear it, and I'll pretend I didn't say it, if discussing it means things will be weird between us.
Her eyes said:
I’m bringing this to you because it weighs on me, and I don’t know where else to take it.
Her eyes said:
... more »
2013-05-16 17:04:35 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 13 +1s)
I have a neighbor, and she has a daughter, and her daughter plays with my grandson, and this dog lays beside them untethered and keeps an eye on them. In this case the dog was babysitting the twins while mommy (the neighbor girl) and daddy (my grandson) dug in the dirt.
2013-05-16 17:14:15 (9 comments, 3 reshares, 16 +1s)
“I’ve never had an orgasm in my life.”
She said after we had several drinks in the living room, and were discussing her present and past relationships.
She said it quickly and glossed it over with several non-relevant things but her eyes told the rest of the story.
Her eyes said:
Is it weird that I’d discuss this with you? Is it weird that I need the opinion of someone who isn’t trying to bang me but is still a man? Is it weird that I want to discuss this with my step dad?
Her eyes said:
Feel free to pretend you didn't hear what I just said. Pretend you didn't hear it, and I'll pretend I didn't say it, if discussing it means things will be weird between us.
Her eyes said:
I’m bringing this to you because it weighs on me, and I don’t know where else to take it.
Her eyes said:
... more »
2013-05-16 14:59:28 (2 comments, 0 reshares, 4 +1s)
Thanks for that..
So, yea: with tumbler downloads, lots of friends, both male and female, and being one good looking SOB, some photos that are on my phone are of the adult category and although I don't share them it's always nice the way my heart almost stops when they show up in my notifications and I'm given the opportunity to share them with all 21679 of my google friends and then suddenly I'm painfully aware of who happens to be in the room with my computer.
2013-05-16 14:23:43 (5 comments, 0 reshares, 6 +1s)
google+ thoughts
It's kind of like I won a surprise complete closet makeover isn't it? I mean here is Google+ all shiny and new and that's great but... I see you threw my old boxers out and replaced them with brand new ones and look, all of my T-shirts are on hangers and color coordinated .
Do you like it? askes the semi hot hostess while bathing me in the HD lighting, and the camera roles.
Ahhhh, yea. It's sure different isn't it? I reply with a little trepidation.
What about the hangouts? See how we've folded them into google chat for you?
Ahhhhh, yea. Things sure are different now aren't they?
Different is good! Progress is being made! You are becoming more efficient! We are helping you to evolve! Congratulations Mr. Swaney. (By Mr. Swaney we are in no way admitting that it is Mr. Swaney or ce... more »
2013-05-14 20:21:51 (0 comments, 1 reshares, 5 +1s)
She is a secret dancer and singer capturing this on video is like catching a dragon or unicorn on tape. Watch very carefully... (volume might be loud)
2013-05-14 16:47:43 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 4 +1s)
This morning while making white albacore tuna salad for the family, my beagler Sara Swaney was by my side. She ate 5 out of 8 of the egg yolks for 2 reasons, she worries about my cholesterol, and she knows that I find few things more disgusting then the chalky ass, puke yellow, gross in every way imaginable, boiled egg yolk. Thank You for taking one for the team.
2013-05-14 14:08:12 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 2 +1s)
After spending the morning hearing about Angelina Jolie getting the double mastectomy.. I just wish she would have done more nudes. #isthatwrong
2013-05-13 23:17:55 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 1 +1s)
just one mans opinion
I'm a big fan of casseroles, it's basically taking tasty things, mixing them together, adding cheese and baking them. But there is an exception to every rule. For me that exception would be shepherds pie, Oh I'm not hating it, but it's not my favorite. I just think it takes the mixing of things a little far. Mashed potatoes are pretty much the perfect food and gravy makes them even better, but then they are perfection. When you start mixing other things with mashed potatoes it's like mixing iced tea and vodka. Tea is good, vodka is good, tea and vodka mixed..... eeeaaaaaahhhhh not quite as good.
#whatsfordinner
2013-05-13 16:19:15 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 1 +1s)
So today I'm trying to give the other, other, white meat a try. By the other, other white meat.. I don't mean chrome, or even IE, but the IE that runs on the Metro side of windows 8, the IE that simply vanishes if you have Chrome as your default browser. I do like the way you can pin bookmarks to the start page.
2013-05-13 06:58:46 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 8 +1s)
I haven't seen her in person since she was about 6 but I saw her tonight on YouTube... My Daughter Sadi Swaney was pinned and commissioned as a second Lieutenant in the USAR. I couldn't be prouder.
2013-05-12 22:32:15 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 3 +1s)
Self-dialog to cell phone…
Defender!?
Defender!?
What am I fricking superhero?
I typed remember, you dumb ass auto-correct.
2013-05-11 16:36:05 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 8 +1s)
"I want some eggs." He said in his hungry grandson voice.
"You just had cereal, we don't do double breakfasts around here." She answered him.
"But I didn't know you were making eggs. I like eggs." He said plaintively.
"Well I'm not making eggs. I'm just feeding my man." she answered him.
I just smile and enjoy my eggs.
it's good to be king
2013-05-11 16:09:52 (1 comments, 0 reshares, 9 +1s)
So yesterday I broke the bike out of the garage and got some two wheel therapy. Yes it was amazing.
2013-05-10 03:23:40 (3 comments, 0 reshares, 11 +1s)
Call it tasteless if you must but if you should lose a limb and have to have it replaced why not get a nice pros?
2013-05-09 02:19:10 (12 comments, 0 reshares, 2 +1s)
I consider myself a huge fan of google.. honestly I do, but chrome is becoming such a memory suck that I'm honestly considering dumping it. Since I've been using windows 8 which has several systems running in the background at all times, including email, I'm starting to wonder if the benefits of Chrome justify the huge memory usage.
Any thoughts?
2013-05-08 02:31:19 (5 comments, 0 reshares, 2 +1s)
So I found this new site, www.pencourage.com and the shtick to it is everyone is anonymous. You create an account and then tell any damn thing you want to. I post a little but it's very cool to read what people post... I won't tell you my user name and I would never ask for yours but it is interesting. If you use it or know anyone else that does I'b be interested in hearing what you think.
2013-05-06 20:09:52 (7 comments, 1 reshares, 10 +1s)
Life, sometimes is full of mysteries. Why do some people have more and some less? Why is she evil to him when he loves her? Why, on some days does it rain and on others the sun shines. How does wind work? How can I wrap my mind around targeted space travel considering time and obits, and the hugeness of the cosmos. How can people possibly enjoy the Tyler Perry Show or Home Improvement. Why does the press manipulate us, and why is President Obama so determined to kill the USA? Aren't we supposed to control the government instead of them controlling us? How can I be so damn good looking now, when I was so ugly as a kid? Why in 6th grade did Barbara Raven, in Russell Kansas agree to be my girlfriend for the whole summer and then pretend she didn't even know me when middle school started? Why aren't I richer, and why can't I focus enough to actually write the book that tumbles around in my mind... more »
2013-05-05 16:16:26 (8 comments, 0 reshares, 12 +1s)
Hot coffee, The Dixie Chicks, Sunday Morning, and this old fat guy is feeling Great!
"What's got the fat bald guy so jacked up and enthusiastic this morning?" you may be asking yourself.
Well I'll tell you. Yesterday I went to CostCo and did a little shopping. I bought some summer shorts and a few shirts and quite frankly I look africkingmazing, but even that's not all. I mean I'm a good looking guy, and well I know it so looking in the mirror at my impressive acreage, is fantastic but not that unusual.
Here's the amazing thing. Yesterday I bought a bath sheet, for those of you who don't know, it's like a bath towel that's about 1 million times more awesome.
This bastard is so fricking big, just walking past it while it hangs on the rack when you just got out of the shower actually causes some of the wet on you to defy ... more »
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