CircleCount helps you better understand Google+

2013-05-15 20:42:27 (255 comments, 139 reshares, 182 +1s)

Changing my gender to male on Google+ improved my What's Hot experience Google+ has updated how they distribute content to users through Explore

Earlier today, +Kimberly Chapman told me about a little experiment she'd done. She'd opened a tab on her browser and directed it to plus.google.com/explore, a stream that enables you to see the hottest content on Google+. In another tab, Chapman changed her gender on her Google+ profile from female to male, and then loaded the Explore page into another tab.

The difference was astonishing. "As a girl, I get stupid warm-fuzzy meaningless shit," Chapman writes on a post (http://goo.gl/ZDBxT). "As a guy, I get nerdy stuff. This is not okay. I get that [What's Hot] algorithms are based on what people click, like, share, comment on, etc. Fine. But I challenge anyone to give me one good reason why there should... more »

2013-05-14 21:53:23 (99 comments, 18 reshares, 96 +1s)

An important sentiment on relationships from Rev. Dr. Charlie Foss, via +Gary Walker. How has it been for you, in your relationships?

2013-05-13 22:46:04 (132 comments, 1 reshares, 49 +1s)

Do you judge your exes' new partners?

"Why Do Men Always Downgrade From The Wives They Had?" That was the subject of the e-mail from First Wives World, a community I joined four years ago when I was going through my divorce and desperately looking for other women living a similar experience, who weren't going to try to convince me that I was somehow failing by not staying and trying to make it work. 

Strangely, the support I was looking for didn't come from other women who formed part of this community, but from people of all walks, in all relationships, who had come to know me via Twitter. This e-mail served to remind me of the reasons the community didn't work out for me -- divorce brings with it a lot of anger, and while I believe it's important to encourage people going through it to express their emotions, I think it's equally important to... more »

2013-05-07 09:31:29 (62 comments, 0 reshares, 56 +1s)

Emotional time is not linear. You feel, therefore you are.

2013-04-30 09:54:37 (96 comments, 10 reshares, 143 +1s)

I still remember what it was like walking in your door that very first time. That brief pause before we decided that this was really happening, that our lives were colliding right here, in the brutal light of morning. Our lips, so used to clever turns of phrase, were silent as they arrived at their logical conclusion. Then there was no turning back. It was more than a moment shared between two people. It was a choice to make of our existence something we wanted, to stop being hostages to time and make of our lives everything we'd ever dreamed, and even those things we'd never allowed ourselves to dream. 

2013-04-18 12:15:30 (166 comments, 25 reshares, 157 +1s)

Yesterday, +Dede Craig King posted an interesting question from one of her readers: How do you seduce a man with class and dignity? Should we wait until men approach us IRL or online? Do men like to be picked up?

This question suffers from the vestiges of a time when female sexuality was not only oppressed, but punished. While we have made a lot of progress in this arena, slut-shaming still exists and the labels “slut,” “whore,” “tramp,” “easy,” and so on are still largely used as a weapon against women.

(I don’t want to minimize prude-shaming or the fact that sexual shaming also happens to men, but in the interest of space, I limited my comment to the question that was asked, which focuses on women.)

When Sigmund Freud wrote “Where such men love they have no desire and where they desire they cannot love,” he basically cleaved the woman in half.To be deserving of lov... more »

2013-04-11 01:06:21 (134 comments, 15 reshares, 105 +1s)

A year ago, +Hugo Schwyzer wrote an article about the “women love assholes” myth. You know the one -- that women confer sex on guys who are total dicks, so if a guy wants to get a girl, he has to be just as big a dick, if not bigger. Schwyzer wrote an excellent piece, but what really caught my attention was the comment section, where a discussion broke out about the fact that "nice" is often used to describe individuals who are not very attractive.

"One of the things that I always find amusing about this is that people tend to ignore one huge correlation -- that women dig the looks of a sex partner," writes Inertlak. Some comments later, Cassandra adds, "There’s a specific kind of guy who gets really angry when he realizes that, much like himself, women tend to want to fuck people who they’re physically attracted to."

This came up again yesterdayafter +M... more »

2013-03-26 01:51:00 (82 comments, 4 reshares, 46 +1s)

March wasn't even upon me when I started to receive press releases for sexual products positioning themselves for the next big holiday, Steak and Blowjob Day, on March 14. For those of you unfamiliar, Steak and Blowjob Day is the "male-equivalent" of Valentine's Day, which proponents of the former believe has become heavily geared toward women.

It wasn't the first time I'd heard about this holiday, but I'd never really given it serious thought before because it had never felt like more than the idea of a few outliers. Seeing companies discussing it in my inbox this year, though, suggested to me that the holiday had acquired a mainstream significance. This bothered me -- not because I don't think men should be adored and receive tokens of love, but because it clearly indicated that a large percentage of men felt they didn't receive the same attentions women... more »

2013-03-19 05:44:37 (257 comments, 11 reshares, 93 +1s)

I keep seeing people on Facebook delete their accounts and then friend-request using joint accounts they have created with their spouses and I simply don't understand the reason why anyone would literally destroy their previous existence because they now find themselves in a serious relationship.

I have heard people say it's more convenient because it enables them to keep all their experiences together in one place -- but Facebook already does this with their Relationship Pages (which are automatically generated). I have also heard people explain it as a way for friends to notify both people at once -- but Facebook makes this easy with the tagging feature on status updates and multiple recipients on Facebook mail and event invites.

I don't know why anyone would delete everything they have lived prior to their relationship for such mundane, practical reasons -- especially... more »

2013-03-15 01:36:40 (73 comments, 10 reshares, 138 +1s)

I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not. Otherwise they turn up unannounced and surprise us, come hammering on the mind’s door at 4 a.m. of a bad night and demand to know who deserted them, who betrayed them, who is going to make amends. -- Joan Didion

2013-03-08 04:37:27 (63 comments, 16 reshares, 87 +1s)

"Even if we grant that women can 'get sex' whenever they want, there is no guarantee of good sex," writes Emily Heist Moss. "If we are consciously or unconsciously defining 'getting laid' as penetration, statistically most men will get off and most women actually won’t (75% of women do not orgasm without clitoral stimulation). The act that most people view as a fundamental building block of a straight sexual interaction is not how most women reach orgasm."

This is a reasonable rebuttal to the accusation that women don't understand what men go through because we don't have to try as hard, since we're the ones who pick what male we confer sex upon. The fact that this needs to be addressed is a little unsettling, since it suggests that men will indiscriminately jump in bed with just about anyone,

I know this is not true. Heterosexual mendo... more »

2013-03-06 20:28:16 (102 comments, 5 reshares, 75 +1s)

My dream last night occurred in the form of a book. I read the entire dream. The story was about a writer, a man without a name. He was in love with a woman named Olga. He had an air of Humbert Humbert about him and he was convinced that Googling people let them know that they were being sought.

Every day, after reading and writing and playing his violin, our protagonist would contemplate finding Olga and disclose to the reader some event from their past together. The events were not in order -- some were sad and some were happy -- and it was difficult to understand why he didn't want her to know that he was looking for her. 

Finally he decided to Google a fictional character, since there was no way the character would ever find out she was being searched. In doing this, our protagonist began to understand how Google worked and he finally decided to search for Olga. He found hero... more »

2013-03-01 12:33:42 (79 comments, 4 reshares, 80 +1s)

Other than this one, what other social networks do you use with any regularity? Do you mostly cross-post content from one to the other or do you have specific purposes for each network? If you have abandoned some networks, what were the main factors for you decision?

2013-02-26 03:11:41 (134 comments, 39 reshares, 132 +1s)

"It's hard to make microbes, telescopes, and math calculations appear sexy," write +Dina Spector and +Jennifer Polland at +Business Insider, introducing their list of fifty "sexiest" scientists alive. They assure us: "These aren't your typical lab coat-wearing, messy-haired brainiacs -- with the exception that they're all pretty brain-y ... We thought this was important, to highlight the brains along with the beauty. But, they're not bad to look at, either."

Social media has provided a great platform in the push to make science more relevant to the general public. Throughout these recent efforts, many have played with different approaches, including the classic advertising strategy of "sex sells." It is questionable, based on my experience, whether this technique has engendered the sort of result that advocates of science and intellectualcu... more »

2013-02-23 08:54:25 (33 comments, 6 reshares, 67 +1s)

If you are the sort of person who steals, don't make a habit of giving out your business card.

This is an interesting story of how social media can be harnessed for justice. Two nights ago, +Tizz Wall and James Kirk went to their neighborhood bar for trivia night. During the course of the evening, the pair momentarily left Kirk's bag containing their laptops unattended on a hook under the bar. When Wall came back for it a few minutes later, the bag was gone. Wall and Kirk immediately began searching for the bag and questioning other patrons -- they soon discovered that one of them, a man named Joe, had seen the bag moments earlier while speaking with another man.

According to Joe, a woman had discovered the bag while taking her purse from one of the hooks, and Joe had asked the man with whom he'd been conversing whether the bag was his. The man had told Joe that itw... more »

2013-02-20 02:29:07 (184 comments, 1 reshares, 63 +1s)

HIM: The flake from last week just texted me.
ME: She's canceled on you three times. What the hell does she want now? You know what, if the text doesn't read "I have been bad, I will be bare-bottomed waiting in my car in front of your apartment building beginning at six o'clock this evening in the event that you decide I am worthy of a spanking" don't even bother to respond.
HIM: That's not what her text says. If it did, it'd be creepy and inappropriate.
ME: Bullshit. A woman could totally pull that shit off.

What do you guys think -- cute way to say sorry or creepy and inappropriate?

2013-02-15 00:46:25 (39 comments, 8 reshares, 79 +1s)

Contraceptive manufacturer Trojan unveiled its new line of “No One’s Pleasure” condoms Wednesday, the first prophylactic specifically designed to intensify sexual dissatisfaction among bitter and resentful couples.

“We’ve always offered consumers a choice when it comes to protection, and we wanted to give emotionally distant partners an option that suits their lack of intimacy,” said Jim Daniels, vice president of marketing at Trojan. “That’s why we’ve developed the only condoms clinically proven to exploit performance anxiety, heighten discomfort levels, and prolong the petty arguments that allow couples to bicker needlessly all night long.”

(Please note that this is a satire.)

2013-02-15 00:10:41 (54 comments, 2 reshares, 34 +1s)

"In an experiment conducted by French psychologists, 18-20 year old single women listened to music while they were ostensibly waiting for the experiment to start," writes +Jason Goldman. "Five minutes later, they interacted with a young male participant while completing a marketing survey.

"In reality, the experiment started as soon as the women began listening to the music, which either included romantic or neutral lyrics. Then, following the marketing survey, the male participant, who was really one of the experimenters, asked the woman for her phone number. As you might expect, the women who had previously listened to romantic lyrics were more likely to give out their numbers than those who had listened to neutral songs."

I believe it's true that music can set the stage, but remember your audience. Just because you think that 80s power ballads are the... more »

2013-02-12 23:24:49 (248 comments, 5 reshares, 107 +1s)

I had a dream with someone in the scientific community. He and I were having sex as part of an elaborate experiment on cognition and stem cells that required us to high-five simultaneously throughout the sex act. He was nervous about it -- not the experiment itself, but the fact that we were using a sheet as a condom. I was also dissatisfied with the sheet as a means of protection, but felt sadly resigned to it.

I'm no stranger to sex dreams, though sex isn't the primary form of expression for my randomly firing neurons. I can't ever recall having a sex dream that wasn't primarily erotic, though, and this dream wasn't erotic at all. We were very serious about the science involved and how the results would impact our respective projects.

I think of dreams as inkblots and when I look at this dream, I can't help but see a sort of commentary on my work as someone... more »

2013-02-07 23:33:27 (63 comments, 8 reshares, 47 +1s)

The best part of knowing +Dave Levine is access to information. Specifically, information regarding what people want in the bedroom. A few days ago, I chased him down and badgered him with questions about what people were buying at +Sextoy.com. 

I wasn't surprised to see a Rabbit vibrator among the top three biggest sellers, given its iconic status, but I wasn't expecting the American Whopper to be number one. The Whopper (http://www.sextoy.com/All-American-Whopper-65-inch-Flesh/sku-CNVELD-NT1895-1) is a 6.5-inch dildo. A very realistic looking dildo.

I can still remember the scene on Sex and the City, the 90s sitcom that made the Rabbit the icon that it is, where Charlotte sees a vibrator for the first time and exclaims: "Look it's so cute! Oh, I thought it would be all scary and weird, but it isn't! It's pink!" That was the thing -- in order to maket... more »

2013-02-06 00:16:00 (199 comments, 3 reshares, 45 +1s)

What's wrong with my book shelf? The first to guess right gets a Valentine from me.

Unless the first one to guess right doesn't want to give me his or her mailing address, in which case the Valentine goes to the most amusing guess. Unless they don't want to give me their address either, in which case I'll just feel #foreveralone and post maudlin updates reminiscent of Evanescence lyrics on Google+ all night long. Ready, set, go! 

2013-02-04 02:07:40 (82 comments, 5 reshares, 64 +1s)

The three worst portrayals of sex in Superbowl commercials this year.

#adbowl   #superads   #superbowl2013  

2013-02-04 01:30:00 (9 comments, 1 reshares, 41 +1s)

Oreo's Superbowl advertising push involves the promoted hashtag #cremethis. I'm a little amazed they didn't use it for the AVN Awards, too. 

2013-02-01 22:11:07 (0 comments, 11 reshares, 63 +1s)

Here's my science. Fund me, maybe?

I found this brilliant parody this morning. Enjoy!   #scio13  

2013-02-01 13:40:15 (232 comments, 11 reshares, 132 +1s)

The other night, while speaking over the phone, I told my mother that I had recently finished a book titled Why Is The Penis Shaped Like That?

"Someone wrote a whole book about that?" she asked in response. "Darling, you should have phoned me! I could have told you."

Somehow, I found it hard to believe that my mother had a better answer than +Jesse Bering, but I bit.

"The penis is irresistible and unsurprisingly, we spend a great deal of time sucking on it," she told me. "If it looked any more appetizing, darling, what's to stop us from biting it right off to devour?"

Ladies and gentlemen, the woman who brought me into this world.

2013-01-29 12:31:13 (31 comments, 3 reshares, 32 +1s)

Instagram has been "securing" (suspending) accounts, giving users a deadline to upload a form of valid identification. Many initially suspected this was a phishing scam, but a Facebook spokesperson told CNET, "Instagram occasionally removes accounts due to violation of terms and, depending on the violation, may ask people to upload IDs for verification purposes."

Their terms, recently revised, state users must be over thirteen to use the service, but it is unclear whether the recent "securing" spree is targeting only users who appear to be under 13. The only thing that is certain is that Facebook is providing users no further assistance in this matter.

We need a place where we can post our not-even-close-to-500px grade phonetography safely, where we know that the community we create by sharing our content with other users won't be taken away from us... more »

2013-01-23 23:23:07 (143 comments, 3 reshares, 39 +1s)

I know most of you think Valentine's is a commercial holiday unworthy of a second thought, but I'm a warrior for the romance inherent in people willing to inconvenience themselves to let their lovers know they're adored. So I ask you, what's the craziest thing you've done to let someone know you care about them? 

2013-01-25 09:40:40 (136 comments, 4 reshares, 92 +1s)

I typed "love is such a strong w" into the address bar and Chrome auto-suggested Stephen Hawking. 

2013-01-18 23:39:47 (79 comments, 11 reshares, 62 +1s)

In December, Facebook made headlines when it announced that it was going to start charging for users to contact strangers [1]. Part of the reason for this is rooted in the company's inability to find a functional solution for spam messages, which they had hoped would be solved when they introduced the "Other" folder, a secondary inbox where "less relevant messages" go [2].

Unfortunately, it seems the network has been unable to properly prioritize incoming mail, condemning legitimate messages into this "Other" box,  a folder few people bother to check on a regular basis, and which appears to be completely inaccessible on Facebook's mobile app.

In an awkward move to "help" people ensure their messages are visible to their intended recipients, Facebook announced last month that it would begin using "economic signals to determine... more »

2013-01-16 01:44:42 (92 comments, 3 reshares, 96 +1s)

HIM: Where are you?
ME: I once knew a man who asked me that all the time.
HIM: What happened to him?
ME: I divorced him.

2013-01-15 22:05:52 (45 comments, 0 reshares, 27 +1s)

Well, if anyone ever wondered why scientists hate to speak to people in the media, now we know for sure. On Sunday, Bloomberg ran a piece about pubic lice titled “Brazilian Bikini Waxes Make Crab Lice Endangered Species” that might have been brilliant (because: pubes!) except it wasn't. Not even a little bit.

The article provides interesting evidence about one Australian clinic that hasn't seen a case of pubic lice since 2008 but get data from no other clinics. Later they note that crabs can be self-treated with insecticide yet fail to provide further information -- did legislation make insecticide available to the public after 2008 in Australia? Was a more effective type of insecticide introduced? A change in the form of application? Have sales figures among the major insecticide brands suffered in the country since waxing started to take off?

No, none of that. But why arewe ... more »

2013-01-15 01:26:00 (52 comments, 1 reshares, 66 +1s)

A RABBIT, A MONKEY, A SERENADE AND A STORY

"What is it about small, warm, fuzzy things that make humans forget themselves?" I ask my cousin Monica as we walk quickly toward my cordwainer's.
 
"I have no idea." She’s clutching the small white rabbit to her chest. 

We've just bought a two week-old rabbit from a street merchant from Chosica, who took the $7.75 and bolted without giving me any change.

Inside the shop, Manolo is yelling at his clients as usual. Manolo is one of those artists who resents the fact that he has to sell his creations to people who do not understand them. He sees soul where others see only soles. He likes me because I come with my own crazy designs, not pages from magazines, and in the end, always let him go where his heart wants to take him.

"Manolo, look!" I call out, walking in.He ... more »

2013-01-12 04:23:18 (77 comments, 0 reshares, 17 +1s)

Sextoy.com is hanging out with 3 people right now in a live Hangout On Air! #hangoutsonair

2013-01-11 23:49:03 (30 comments, 3 reshares, 46 +1s)

It's a Friday night and we're up to absolutely no good. Will you come play with us? I've teamed up with +Dave Levine of +Sextoy.com to bring you a taste of XBIZ's 2013 Awards -- one of the biggest shows in adult entertainment.  +matthew rappaport and I are hosting a Hangout On Air tonight discussing current trends in pleasure and sexuality, with frequent updates from Dave, who will be reporting live from the show. Bring your questions, quips and curiosity and experience the event from the comfort of your couch, where clothing is always optional. 

To RSVP for the event, visit the event page here (if you have set your location accurately on Google+, the event page will tell you the time of the show in your specific time zone): https://plus.google.com/events/c3ti10osoac6p1l5vm2dbuj1ipk 

If you are in the adult industry or have a lot to say about it, leave a commentand w... more »

2013-01-10 12:58:49 (52 comments, 8 reshares, 39 +1s)

An oldie but goodie: "All human beings perform unilateral and selfish acts," Lederer and Jackson write in The Mirages of Marriage. "To do so is not always bad; it sometimes can be wholesome if the individual knows what is happening. But under no circumstances can these acts be regarded as loving, and the first requirement for a workable marriage is to live and relate on the basis of reality, not of myths, obsolete and meaningless traditions, and self-deceit."

The construct of matrimony as we know it no longer fits: we're more individualist, more isolated, more mobile -- and, yes, maybe more ADD, more demanding in terms of instant gratification than we were 40 years ago when Lederer and Jackson first pointed out that the institution was obsolete.

So what's the answer? How do you make it work?

2013-01-08 14:20:59 (133 comments, 6 reshares, 79 +1s)

I am working. But I should be doing something more like this. You?

2013-01-01 05:09:53 (40 comments, 5 reshares, 83 +1s)

Love conquers all, they say. Sometimes it does. Often it doesn't. I don't think it's a question of real love versus false love so much as the reality that love -- like longing, desire, faith, and even hate -- are facets of the cycle of hope and despair we inhabit. As with rock, paper and scissors, we never know what will see us through until we see the future's hand. Sometimes pure desire is enough to keep us going. Sometimes even love itself can't bring us home.

2012-12-28 01:58:47 (25 comments, 34 reshares, 53 +1s)

"I don't think I'm cynical!" I exclaimed. "Do you think I'm cynical?"

2012-12-24 03:37:15 (71 comments, 4 reshares, 39 +1s)

Do you have a New Year's resolution?

2012-12-21 03:41:03 (81 comments, 1 reshares, 36 +1s)

Endtimes -- is it or isn't it? If yes, how have you prepared? (Why, yes, shaking up a cocktail totally counts as preparing.)

2012-12-19 17:48:24 (35 comments, 10 reshares, 21 +1s)

For people interested in all things sex, this is the circle for you. As always, if there is anyone you think I should add, let me know!

2012-12-18 02:54:50 (27 comments, 9 reshares, 62 +1s)

Holiday Gift Guide DNA Portraits

It's that lovely time of the year again, good gentles! You can't even go to Target to replace a sugar bowl without having to face the maddened hordes. Parking around any commercial location is a disaster. The relentless countdown on everything from TV ads to spam e-mails -- seven shopping days left! Six shopping days left! Five shopping days left! -- are a constant reminder of your failure to procure that perfect gift. I can't guarantee it will be perfect, but I have some suggestions about that gift.

For the nerd or narcissist in your life -- a portrait of themselves. And not just any portrait. A DNA portrait. Mind you, if you want to do this on the down-low, you're going to have to find a creative way to swab the recipient's cheeks without arousing suspicion. The best option is probably to get them a gift certificate. Andd... more »

2012-12-17 17:51:26 (93 comments, 16 reshares, 106 +1s)

THE PLUS SIDE: True stories about people you see on G+ all the time

Most people who end up in the adult industry don’t dream about it since they were little kids, and +Dave Levine was no different. Growing up in Boston, his father had his own business, and Dave grew up with similar aspirations. When the web came around, Dave knew it was the right platform, if he found a way to harness it. 

"Everyone said I was stupid," he recalls. "In their defense, my original idea to use the internet to sell high-end art wasn't that great. But I was willing to try a bunch of stuff and see which one worked." 

In 1995, he had a site where people could order just about anything -- a sort of proto-Amazon, composed of various little online stores. The sex toy store, to his surprise, consistently showed the best traffic and profit margins, so Dave did what anybusi... more »

2012-12-17 07:00:33 (77 comments, 4 reshares, 39 +1s)

Post-coital conversations -- yes or no? If yes, what is the most memorable thing you have ever discussed in bed with a lover?

2012-12-13 23:08:14 (51 comments, 36 reshares, 139 +1s)

THE PLUS SIDE: True stories about people you see on G+ all the time

After cutting the skull open, he removes the brain -- a slightly complex maneuver that requires him to carefully cut, largely by feel, the blood vessels that connect the circulatory system to the it, along with some twelve cranial nerves. Failure to do this properly can cause the tissues to tear in unpredictable ways and become useless, so he must move slowly and with precision.

This what +Michael Habib does in a nutshell. He takes bodies apart. Today, he is working on a brain. It's a pinkish white color, some five and a half inches in diameter. Once removed,it is placed on a ten-by-ten inch stainless steel plate, ready for sectioning -- or else it is sealed in a glass container with preservative for future use. 

"That's not the natural color of a brain," he says preparing thebr... more »

2012-12-12 20:40:18 (52 comments, 1 reshares, 42 +1s)

Holiday Gift Guide

It's that lovely time of the year again, good gentles! The same eight songs on repeat in every commercial establishment, ugly sweaters on everyone from the grocer to your stylist, and the complete blank you're drawing trying to think of what to give that special someone in your life. I can't help you with the first two, but before you bury your face in a considerable dune of crushed Valium, I may have some suggestions about that gift.

For that wordsmith in your life -- a gorgeous dictionary. Webster's Dictionary, to be exact, altered to hide 250 milliliter (about a U.S. cup) glass flask. Some days, the muse requires a stiff drink more than she does dedication to the word mines. I know it and you know it and your writer friend knows it. You just need to be willing to cough up the $99.95.

Oh, and PS: alcohol and Advil solds... more »

2012-12-12 19:13:45 (0 comments, 0 reshares, 9 +1s)

Sextoy.com trivia game show Live on air December 19  (9PM EST/ 6PM PST)

The show will be hosted by +Dave Levine   (Sex Toy Dave) and co-hosted by +matthew rappaport 

We have prizes for the first place winnner, 2nd place winner, and for the live audience viewer champion.   

To exactly what you can win, check out this page
http://www.sextoy.com/page/sextoycom/8596/SexToycom-Trivia-Game-show.html

Or watch this video
Sex Toy Prizes for SexToy.com Trivia contest happening on December 19, 2012 PST.

RSVP now!

Want to be a contestant?  Let me know!

Thanks!    
Dave

2012-12-11 21:04:32 (63 comments, 2 reshares, 36 +1s)

Holiday Gift Guide

It's that lovely time of the year again, sweet readers! Time to scramble for gifts, to receive gloating annual newsletters from people you'd rather not know about, to make preparations to see your family only to have your mother ask you when you're going to insert-thing-you-have-no-hope-of-doing-anytime-soon-here. I can't help you with your mother's expectations, but before you bury yourself under a mountain of Xanax, I may have some suggestions about those gifts. 

For that old-school photog in your life -- a standard half-inch, fixed length English bridle leather camera strap from Tipton & Co. ($59.00). Simple and strong, and built to be used. Best part? No large brand stamps or logos, just a small mark above stitching on one end. All style, all the time. 
... more »

2012-12-11 00:15:47 (55 comments, 6 reshares, 51 +1s)

If you'd been a fly on the wall at lunch...

"I feel so disconnected from him," she said. "He's on set filming. We were in a deep conversational groove and I feel like we lost it. It may be temporary, I don't know, but it's disconcerting."

"This is why I stand behind e-mails as the preferred choice of modern erotic communication," I responded. "True, you could use e-mail as one does text messaging or IM, but if you have the audacity to use it the way we once did letters, you enrich the communication and decrease the expectation of immediacy, giving one another time to exist, reflect and, eventually, respond. Let the anticipation be part of the dance."

"You have more patience than I do," she lamented.

"You have to rebel against this notion of instant gratification!" I exclaimed. "It... more »

2012-12-06 06:33:24 (111 comments, 8 reshares, 111 +1s)

There are so many drafts in my Gmail inbox dedicated to you, like I was trying to say what I felt but couldn't manage the words until I was standing before you, naked as truth.